All Hail, The Ant Dude Has Arrived!

Guess who came to my house yesterday?

Yep, that’s right. The Ant Dude.

If this is your first time here, or in case you missed the post when I was complaining about all the ants that are invading my home. You can read about it here and get up to speed with the rest of us.

Now that your up to speed… for 3 loooong years I have been battling these ants from spring to fall.

My MIL and FIL and my BIL and SIL are starting to have problems here on the farm with the same dang ants.

My FIL started checking around to see about prices to rid us of this infestation. And to see if they would give us a discount if we did all three houses at the same time.

He found the best price and scheduled a visit.

Yesterday.

He came and he sprayed the inside of my house. Then he sprayed the outside. Guaranteeing up to 10 feet around the perimeter of my house. We’ll see. Those ants are pretty feisty and resourceful.

Last year, they infested our closets. I’m not even gonna go into it. But I am tetering on the edge of insanity and the ants are to blame.

This year, the only closet they have showed up in, is mine.

Of course, mine!

 Why would they go anywhere else, when they can drive ME a little closer to the place where they have rubber rooms and you get to wear a straight jacket if you don’t keep your mouth shut.

 I can just hear those pesky little ants, “Let’s send her over the edge!

 So I had to take everything out of my closet so he could spray in there.

Do you know how much stuff is in my closet? Too much, that’s how much!

I didn’t have to take the clothes off the pole they were hanging on, though. Since he only had to spray around the floor area.

But you know what happened?

The dad blame thing fell!

 

And not only did the clothes fall in the floor, but the pole bent. Rendering is unusable.

 Now my bed is covered with all my clothes and I have no where to put them until my closet is fixed.

NOTHING CAN BE SIMPLE FOR ME!!!

EVERYTHING HAS TO TURN INTO A MAJOR OPERATION!!!

Why can’t I just get the closet sprayed and put everything back and be DONE?

OH, NOOOO! THAT’S TOO SIMPLE!!! 

I was gonna even do a little extra and vacuum it before I put everything back. Well, you know what. The heck with the vacuuming. Let there be dirt. Who cares.

That would probably turn into a major operation by itself. The vacuum cleaner would probably attack me or something.

The ants and the pole in my closet have joined forces. They are right now, in my closet debating how it is that they will drive me over the edge.

Send me running across this farm. Pulling my hair out by the roots.

Screaming, “I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE”!

The ants know their time has come. It is now up to the closet to finish the task that the ants have started.

But I’m not gonna let it win. Nope. I’m gonna fight back! Just like I fought the ants. Hopefully, I have won that battle. I’ll know in a few days. 

I’ll get back to you on that.

I’m gonna take that closet pole outside and teach it a thing or two. Then I’m gonna bury that pole in a shallow grave where no one will find it.

And just to convince you the closet is out to get me…

A couple of weeks ago, my closet doorknob broke. I couldn’t get inside, I had to wear the same clothes for three days. Until The Captain felt sorry for me, or was it that poignant odor that followed me around everywhere? Hmmm…

 Anyway, The Captain took a screwdriver to my door knob and took it off. Now there’s no door knob. Atleast, I can change clothes.

Do you know how many times I have reached for that door knob, only to come up empty handed? (SIGH)

That’s not the end of the story.

I took myself to the local home improvement store and bought a new door knob for my closet.

It don’t fit the door.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!

I’d go to bed and sleep, just to forget and refresh my mind.

BUT I CAN’T!!

THE BED IS COVERED WITH THE CLOTHES THAT BELONG IN MY CLOSET!!!!